When I bum out, I bum out real hard. The irony of this is that right now, my life is perhaps the best it's ever been. A lot of negativity that I've been carrying around for a long time is gone and I've got a swell new job that you may or may not be aware of (Editor in Chief of Radio Free Chicago, represent!) and I've been integrated into a wonderful and vibrant local scene here in Detroit that has done nothing if not inspire me to write about music with the wide of ferocity of a much younger Amber, only with more experience on my side this time.
However, you don't have to know me long to realize that I set extremely high standards for myself. In my professional life, I'm tenacious enough to reach my goals and somehow know enough about how to deal with people to get the job done. In my personal life, however... Well, I'll leave you with the following anecdote: I was at a picnic on the water with my friend. He and I canoed back with a gentlemen from out of town. When said out-of-towner got back ashore, he asked another picnicker if "that girl ever talks about anything other than herself". (For the record, I'm pretty sure the only things I said about myself were said not to this guy but during conversation with my friend.) I've had a consistent lack of social skills, an overwhelming "weirdness" and have been a polarizing person since I was a young thing so this stranger's reaction doesn't entirely shock me and to be honest, it's more funny to me than anything, and it has nothing to do with any bumming going on. It's just an anecdote. The bumming, for the record, has to do with boys and family and all the stupid ridiculous shit that I feel the incredible need to have but cannot succeed at to save my life.
So I made that mix for Brent a few days back. As a companion, to lift everyone's spirits, I had decided to make a "Positive" mix to go along with the negative. However, I just wasn't feeling it. I tried, I did, but maybe the fact of the matter is that the bulk of my iTunes is music to bum out to or perhaps I just couldn't get in the mood to drum up enough positivity for a mix. So, instead, I made another bummer of a mix and I think I did the impossible: I made an even sadder mix than sad mix numero uno, a mix intended to be a sad mix to end all sad mixes. So draw the blinds, think about your most painful failed relationship, and get ready to shed some tears. This is one for the ages, with all the usual Hot Half suspects.
Editor's note: In lieu of the typical track listing I usually do, you get nothing. I would apologize but I'm not sorry.
Reason To Not Drink Every Night For God-Knows-How-Long? You Emerge Feeling Like This.
02 Girls Are Always Wrong - Lightning Love
03 Collect Call - Metric
04 Anyone's Ghost - The National
05 Black Hole - She & Him
06 I'm a Broken Heart - The Bird and The Bee
07 Skinny Love - Bon Iver
08 House Fire - Someone Still Loves You, Boris Yeltsin
09 The Lottery - Emily Haines and the Soft Skeleton
10 Twilight - Elliott Smith
11 A Stone - Okkervil River
12 Maps - Arcade Fire
13 The Drinks We Drank Last Night - Azure Ray
14 Everything Will Be Alright - The Killers
Editor's Note: Yes, "Indier Than Thou" Amber included The Killers on a mix. Hot Fuss was a great album, she stands by that, and if you don't agree, you can shove it. And the "cover art" is snagged from Kurt Halsey again but considering how many of you out there have tattoos of his art, you probably knew that already.
